Crohn's, The Inflammatory Bowel Disease....
These are the experiences of the Crohnie, Vern...
His ongoing mission...
To explore strange new bathrooms....
To seek out new toilets and new bidets....
To boldly "GO" where no one has gone before......
As I lay on the couch dealing with the three abscesses in a NOT so pleasant area, gas pains and fatigue and while waiting for tomorrow to come as it is my year anniversary for Remicade infusions.....I thought of the day that Crohn's, and bowel diseases in general, will be cured.
So, what would an obituary say about Crohn's........here's my version......
Crohn’s Disease, prominent bowel disease, died last night from
complications of losing his soul mates Ileitis and Colitis. No one is really
sure of his age, but according to written records, he was over 81 years old.
Asked about the loss of his dear friend, IBS,
the soon to be obsolete and forgotten disease, described Crohn’s as complicated
and was looked up to by other diseases of the body for his wide range of
In the final days of his life, he revealed an unknown side of
his psyche.This hidden quasi-Freudian persona
surfaced in the super-ego-like pursuit of his desire to be the number one
Sadly, the protracted search ended early Monday morning in
complete and utter failure.Yet even in
certain defeat, the courageous Crohn’s secretly clung to the belief he was to
He is survived by IBS but has also come to
the realization that soon another obituary will be written about him and will
only survive in the pages of old medical journals.